Happy Holidays folks...

Let's Look at the Highlights

Hope everyone had a rockin' Christmas, I know I did! Look forward to invading New York with the lot of you and rocking out like my mom to Sexyback in the kitchen (happening RIGHT NOW). Bizarre. Maybe.

New York, SUIT UP.

Your TMNT II Moment of the Day

That is all. Snootchie bootchies.

and it's still hurting

Excellent New York City Advertising

This one's been on the back of a lot of city buses lately:


Question- What does this girl's ass have to do with Georgi Vodka?
Answer- It doesn't matter.

Another one I pass on the way to work every day:

Caption most certainly reads:
"AHHHH there's a snake behind you!"

Perhaps to Lighten the Mood

THIS is the Appropriate Reaction

I feel like this captures my sentiment for the season.

B/c I know you miss him

My Life Is Better Because of You

PTMMS - one of a few

prize for the first person to decipher the acronym.

Exclusive Sneak Peek

You can't see this anywhere else people...the JACC is looking righteous.
Sent from my future teleportation device...sweet.

Home Sweet Dome

Cruisin campus with my phone.
Sent from my future teleportation device...sweet.

Angry Rant

Saturday afternoon left me with a good deal of anger and consternation. In order to vent some of these feelings and make myself a little happier, I'd like to compose a list of some people I really, really don't like. I think I'm a pretty easy-going guy, but you just can't be on everyone's good side, and vice-versa. So here it is, the Ass Hat list.

Let's start this off with the two people that gave me the whole idea in the first place. Pat Haden and Tom Hammond. Pat. What can I say? I really love the fact that you signed up for a job commentating for a team which was once your sworn enemy. I mean, back then it was your job to hate ND. Your insightful comments and keen wit sure soothed the agony of losing once again to your old team.

Tom Hammond. You look like Bea Arthur. NBC hiring you and your buddy to commentate for ND games is like having Russia write a history on how awesome tearing down the Berlin Wall was. Thanks for rubbing salt deep into my injured psyche after this weekend's game.

Mark May. This one's pretty obvious. I know Lou can get a little nuts and hit you with some spittle from time to time, but that doesn't give you the right to hate us so much. When I was a little kid they told us in school that a good reporter is unbiased and gives you the news straight. I guess that's not you. Sorry you had to play for the Redskins. Nice glasses though.

Matt Leinart. I really, really, really don't like you. Sorry you're getting upstaged at work by someone five times your age. Ever since you cheated to win your game against us in 2005 you've been on my bad side. If I wouldn't have gone to jail for hitting you with my saxophone after the game I probably would have done it. No biggie, Dick Vitale kicked it over a year later anyway at a pep rally. Back to the point though. I don't think you're as good as you think you are. There, I said it. Plus, you're friends with the next guy on the list.

Nick Lachey. You're mostly on here because you're friends with Matt Leinart. One thing's for sure though, you may think you're Burt Reynolds, but you're not. At least you're from Ohio. That's pretty cool. One question for you: was it worth it, doing that Sports Illustrated On Campus story with Matt? It sure made me mad. At least your wife was hot. Not too smart, but hey who's counting?

Barefoot Contessa. She is the worst. Talk about the Idle Rich. It bugs me that her husband and I share the same name. It's like when she talks about how she makes him do things for her on the show she's telling me to beckon to her every whim too. Shudder. Nice popped collar too. I didn't know denim stood up like that. It looks great though, just great.

Now, I'm really not that bad of a guy, just a little angry. To complement my list of Ass Hats, here is the Non-Ass Hat list. These people are the balls.

Steve Winwood. Hell yes. That should be all I have to say but I'll keep going. Not only did you write some bomb music on your own, but you were the mastermind behind the Spencer Davis Group and Traffic, jamming with Eric Clapton and others along the way. "Gimme Some Lovin'" was so cool it made it into the Blues Brothers. Wow. "Valerie"? "The Finer Things"? I'm happier just thinking about those songs. That's some Higher Love Captain Dick'n'balls!

Lando Calrisian. How do you spell redemption? L-A-N-D-O. He taught us that anyone can come back. Even after selling out your friends and getting your buddy frozen in carbonite, you managed to see the error in your ways and make up for everything. That little manouver at the Battle of Tinab, calling everyone "Pirate", blowing up the Second Death Star. The list goes on and on. Awesome.

Mega Man. "Oh, that's a cool weapon. I think I'll take it from you after I totally jam you up and turn you into bunch of spinning blue lights." Outstanding force for good, plus besides Mario and a few other video game legends, I can't think of anyone who's been able to make it through so many sequels. Even more than Rocky, and that's saying something. Many thanks for saving the world from Dr. Wily a couple dozen times.

There you have it folks, the Ass Hats and the non-Ass Hats. Aaahhhh, I feel better already.

-Jeff

Take That Suckers!

Dr. Strangelove style.

PS - Jimmy Clausen threw that meteor from South Bend. Golden Tate hopped on just for fun.

PPS - Look what else I found on those zany internets:

PPPS - In case you want to get as pumped for the game as Pete Carroll, check out this blog: http://ndchoochoo.blogspot.com/

-Jeff

FUSC

Go Irish! Balls out!

Bullet for my Valentine's Drumset

Probably.

-Jeff

Happy THURS...DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY!!KUFO!IYF!O!

Headphones on. Have a \nn/ METAL \nn/ day.

Back in the high life again

Greg, Did you give Windell a hug when he came to South Bend?

Mind Freak

Brandon thinks Criss Angel is LEGIT.
That's all.

Vor fünf Jahren

Five years ago, a group of young Americans went to Munchen to drink some beer. They were successful. Sprechen Sie Englisch!!!

















I miss five years ago.

Thesis

Colin Kaepernick is Barry Badrinath

What can I say...I'm better when I'm drunk!

I'm So Excited!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!1!!!1

When I searched for 'Notre Dame awesome' on google images, this came up. Go Irish.

-Jeff

Lazy Sunday

RIP Reading Rainbow

Reading Rainbow, which was born about the same time as most of us, is airing it's final episode today. For anyone familiar with the show this news is deeply saddening. If you've never seen the show, it featured Geordi La Forge, hyper-literate children, great books, thrilling animations, and an excellent theme song. But you don't have to take my word for it...

Feel free to share a eulogy in the comments section.

Naval Aviation

Not quite. Close though.

A couple videos from the training iz on my faceboox if you guys want to check them out. Like this:



and this!



I've also taken a ton of pictures of the survival training portion. Finish up next week. You know what that means. One week until i do nothing again, two weeks until we Wake up the Echoes, and three weeks until...wait for it....ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA. Oh Yes.

Too Many Good Choices....

Pulp Fiction is chock full o' good Samuel L Jackson quotes. It's tough picking a favorite one, but here's a quality exchange between him and John Travolta. I've tried to censor it slightly for all the kiddies out there.

Travolta: It's laying your hands in a familiar way on Marsellus' new wife. Is it as bad as eating her pu**y out? No, but it's the same fu**ing ballpark.
Samuel L: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop right there. Eating the b**ch out and giving the b**ch a foot massage ain't even the same fu**ing thing.
Travolta: It's not. It's the same ballpark.
Samuel L: Ain't no fu**ing ballpark neither. Now look, maybe your method of massage differs from mine, but you know, touchin' his wife's feet and sticking your tongue and the holiest of holies ain't "the same fu**ing ballpark." It ain't the same league, it ain't even the same fu**ing sport. Look, foot massages don't mean sh**.
Travolta: Have you ever given a foot massage?
Samuel L: Don't be tellin' me about foot massages. I'm the foot fu**ing master.
Travolta: You've given a lot of them?
Samuel L: Sh** yeah. Got my technique down and everything. I don't be tickling or nothing.
Travolta: Would you give a guy a foot massage?
Samuel L: Fu** you.


-Jeff

Hold On To Your Butts

I should be doing Aviation Navigation right now, but earlier today while I was getting lunch I decided to treat myself to a cheeseburger. I sat there for a moment, contemplating how the hamburger is a metaphor for the state of our Nation and the Health Care question. Then I slowly took a bite, with all these thoughts weighing on my conscience. I thought to myself, "MMMMM, This IS a tasty burger". Which got me to thinking about the greatest Samuel L. Jackson characters and one liners. I myself have a hard time answering this question and it seems like it would be a more "Top Five" type situation. But here's mine

Favorite Character: McDowell's Robber




Favorite Line: Die Hard with a Vengeance (the tv edited version)
John McClane: You don't know how to shoot a gun?
Zeus: Look, all brothers don't know how to shoot guns, you racist melonfarmer.


Let that sink in a little, then post a favorite of your own. I need the entertainment

KICKIN IT HERE....OLD SCHOOL

Too bad your ass got ssssssssaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaacccccccccckkkkkeeeddddd

For those who were curious this was the first picture
that came up for "funny DC". They were all post me.
Post me. So I did.

So this is the first funny picture (2nd overall)
that came up for "funny dc". The kids parents
are pissed that I'm posting it on this blog but
whatever. This is the interwebs. Be careful what
you post people! To all those living in DC, it's been
classic! To alls y'alls who visited I hope it's been
great...cause imao.... it was. And to all those who
will experience my future visits...WHAT!?!?! (McFly)
Crazy!!...they'll be great.
Keep in touch my bitches!
GBollcrest out!
Well at least out of DC........

Childhood Dream - 4 of a Few

Sigh. Maybe some day....

-Jeff

Once Upon a Time, When Greg and Martin Were in Third Grade...

Bands in South Bend could get away with looking like this.

If you're interested in learning more about the music that made South Bend second only to Seattle in 90's musical significance, check out this blog:

http://southbendpower90s.blogspot.com/

Lots of good reading in there, along with many a funny flier design and band photo.

-Jeff

Play Like a Boss Champion Today

Apparently ESPN has a new online show-thing called Fan Feast. Here is a clip about a sign, a football team, and a sweet old man with a lisp.

Anyone know what game(s) they are going back for this fall?

Behold

A timely follow-up.

4th of July Post a Couple Days Late

If this doesn't get your red-blooded American, er, well blood going I don't know what will.



Happy 4th.

-Jeff

AMERICA!

I'm about to spread freedom all over the place

Childhood Dream - 3 of a Few

This here apple sure has fallen far from the tree....


Jeff

Nickelodeon in the 90s

Maybe I should have stopped watching cartoons by the time many of these aired... but I didn't.

Rugrats was one of my little sister's favorite cartoons. I watched it with her because I was a nice older brother and because it was awesome.

Nickelodeon also had some really wierd but great cartoons. The Ren & Stimpy Show is probably the best example, but Rocko's Modern Life was also quite strange.

Then there was the kid that wore that killer sweater vest & shorts combo every day and had a friend with green skin.

Now all I have to do is figure out what Nickelodeon stands for...

Legacy of Captain Planet

Swat Kats and Ducktales are my favorites mentioned so far. Greg mentioned Captain Planet briefly, but take a moment to consider that show's achievements.

First of all, the list of guest voice actors is just ridiculous. Everybody wanted to be on this show, and this was back before being green was cool. Richard Gere was even supposed to voice one of the villains, but ended up backing out. A partial list of people who did appear on the show is as follows:

Whoopi Goldberg
Ed Asner
Meg Ryan
Martin Sheen
Jeff Goldblum
Sting
Helen Hunt
Danny Glover
Phil Hartman
Casey Kasem
Neil Patrick Harris
Vanna White

Captain Planet also contained a character named Duke Nukem...



Although it is not the same Duke Nukem from the video games, it still brings this image to mind everytime...


Lastly, Captain Planet had (hands down) the best villain names of any cartoon (but definately not the best villains... I'll vote for Batman on that one):

Hoggish Greedly
Looten Plunder
Verminous Skumm
Sly Sludge
Tank Flusher III

And so I leave you with...



Also, Darkwing Duck

More Favorite Cartoons

These last few days of posts have convinced me that our cartoons were WAY more badass than anything on TV today. Except maybe Sponge Bob. He's a BAMF.

Here are some more favorites you may remember:











I hope these bring back some good memories.

-Jeff

Where has this chair been all my life?

Everything this guy says is hilarious.

See more funny videos and Technology Videos at Today's Big Thing.

Childhood dream or life goal?

I was a Cartoon Junkie when I was little...

..then again who wasn't.

The cartoon list is extensive. Too many good ones... I second Batman & Johnny Quest. Also Thundercats, Masters of the Universe, GI Joe, Transformers, MASK (also a favorite toy series...anyone else remember these?), Mysterious Cities of Gold (anyone? I remember it came on stupid early), C.O.P.S., Heathcliff, Super Mario Brothers' Super Show, Legend of Zelda, Captain Planet, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Voltron, and these gems...



and





JEM is truly outrageous.
Truly, truly, truly, outrageous.
Woah-oah-oah, JEM.
JEM.
The music's contagious.
Outrageous.
JEM is my name,
No one else is the same,
JEM is my name!
JEM!!

Sorry had to get that out.

I Wanted a Pen on a Necklace

WORD

This Should Come as No Surprise

Thought I would take this the route of AWESOME childhood cartoons that go hand in hand with childhood dreams



That should make perfect sense right.




I should also include Batman, and Superman...and Gargoyles...Do you guys remember How BADASS THAT WAS! STONE BY DAY WARRIORS BY NIGHT


We grew up with badass cartoons....The kids these days are going to grow up to be a bunch of pussies with the stuff they watch.

Another childhood dream

Juicers,

I really like the "Childhood Dreams" series Jeff started here. Let's all share the dreams we had when people wore adidas and we lived life slow. Here is one of mine... helpin' kids with the Prostars.

The theme song is pure gold.

For all the building professionals out there...

http://www.clarkmade.com/urinals.html

Ya, these are for real.

Childhood Dream - 2 of a Few

Dogs and cats, living together, MASS HYSTERIA!!!

-Jeff

Dino Riders

Jeff, I think we've had a conversation about this before, but if anyone else hasn't heard of Dino Riders, do yourself a favor and buy some of the toys. They're awesome.

You are not alone...

Jesus rocked the dino-transport too

Childhood Dream - 1 of a Few

I don't think I'm alone in this one.

-Jeff